Visioning the Perfect “First Time”

7b40a55cb568d838c70ca7b2091ae8c0We all remember our first kiss, who we first made love to, the first time we discovered self-pleasuring, perhaps the first time we were sexually harassed or even sexually assaulted…  When we have a first time experience a new neural pathway is made in the brain and body. Unconsciously, this becomes the default. Consciously, it is a reference point we can return to to either re-create or to re-pattern. Reviewing my firsts in life, I began to desire something more, more ceremony, more invitation of the sacred, more consciousness. I began to wonder of ceremonies that could be created, meaningful beautiful rituals for our first times… what would these ceremonies look like to honor a first kiss, or the first time we shared a lovers touch? And how would we create ceremonies to heal from negative first time experiences?

In the world I want to live in, I envision beautiful, healing, empowering ceremonies where women taught their daughters to love and pleasure their bodies and embrace their beauty and that their sexuality was a precious gift… where men taught their sons about integrating their sexual energy with a heart-based connection.

When I let myself dream and vision my perfect time, it would begin by consciously visiting the town’s sexual priestess who would initiate me in the feminine mysteries of the pleasure my body was capable of and later a second ceremony that would introduce me to the pleasure and delights of sharing this experience with a first time beloved of my choosing. In each ceremony, I imagine a sexual priestess holding space and guiding the initiation of pleasure and teaching me the art of love beginning with my own body and then sharing and exploring a lovers. I would want this ceremony for myself around the age of 16, after the initial shock of puberty was over and I was grounded in my new woman’s body. I would love my imaginary parents to be totally on board with this ceremony like a sweet sixteen only it’s where a young woman comes to know her body and pleasure and how to pleasure and honor another.

That would be my perfect first time… What’s the vision of your perfect first time?

 

 

Sacred Haven: A Sensual Monastic Life

Orlando deserves it’s own blog post. I’ve been here since February 1st and the processes and deep soul conversations unfolding around me are ones that have left me truly transformed and in a state of tremendous gratitude. I am staying in the beautiful sanctuary of Sacred Haven which is set up as a church here in Orlando, Florida.

Bishop EveLynn MaurineThe Bishop here is EveLynn Maurine, a long time friend and colleague over my years in sacred sexual healing work.  EveLynn was the previous president of ASEP (Association of Sexual Energy Professionals) and has earned her title as the Pope-ess of sacred sexuality among her community.  Her soul energy holds the polarities of deep spiritual reverence like that of Mary Magdalene with the bawdiness and irreverence of the vamp Mae West. She is the spiritual grandmother to many sexual healers nationally and in the local community and it has been an absolute blessing to be in residence at her temple space in Florida.

Morning Sadhana PracticesI am living here in Orlando what at times feels like a sensual monastic life. I awake and have a glass of herbal infusion with lemon and apple cider vinegar and begin my morning Taoist and yogic practices and meditation. Roman, EveLynn’s beloved makes us coffee and I then cook us breakfast and set up my schedule for the day managing clients and noting errands that need running. There are simple things to do here that require tending that lead to a deeper contemplative life, composting, tending to the livestock – two terriers and a beagle, housekeeping and gardening, session work, taking calls from fellow practitioners seeking mentoring and counsel, writing in the evening and soul conversations over good home cooked food, watching a film on history or practice of sexual education evening Taoist jade egg practices followed with a dip in the pool or hot tub and following up with beloveds before bed. Rise, Rinse, Repeat.

Flora and Fauna of Florida

Flora and Fauna of Florida

As I am here, there has been a quiet settling in my bones. Florida moves much slower than New York and my mind, body and spirit seem to be going through a deep and profound healing here because there is time and space to do so. The sanctuary of Sacred Haven has a deep healing energy and as I was reading over EveLynn’s mission statement for it, I was struck – that exactly what she has said in her statement, she has created. Sacred Haven is a sanctuary for the senses and sacred space where people can visit and find ‘peace and reverence, teach and learn, write and read, play and pray, heal and be healed.’ When sessions are slow, EveLynn and I sit and talk for hours. Roman, her beloved, listens and holds space. She is a fount of information and wisdom in regards to sacred sexuality, tantra, sexological bodywork and sex and disabilities as well as transformational ceremonies. For women and select men seeking mentoring in the area of stepping into erotic education work professionally, I HIGHLY recommend her mentoring program.

I had the extraordinary gift of receiving a session from EveLynn and her beloved Roman while I was here. I realized this is the first time I’ve received a session from a couple. I’ve had women, men and multiple women facilitate session work for me, but have never received it from a pair-bonded couple. I must say it was extraordinary. We lay on the bed and I was spooned on both sides and held in a loving embrace before we began so that I felt like I was enfolded in a cocoon of unconditional love. EveLynn took me through energetic breathing practices to stir my sexual energy and raise it up through my body for healing and release. She then led me over to the table and I laughed and cried and trembled for an hour under their touch. So much released from my body and my being that I didn’t even know I was holding onto. Tears over my transitioning relationship with my beloved husband, the anger I felt at myself over staying in New York long past my soul’s expiration date there, the conflict of feeling at the same time grief about leaving New York, all of this stuck energy that had caused me massive almost debilitating backpain for months moved up my spine and out through tears, laughter and the release of primal energy. In closing ceremony, both Isis OrlandoEveLynn and Roman laid a hand over my heart chakra and womb center in perfect balance at the end of the session and smiled lovingly at me. My entire being was washed clean after this experience, like a great dam had opened and everything pent up inside had flooded out. It was a truly profound intiation and healing and opened my eyes to the power of a couple offering this work together.

The highlight of my time, there have really been so many, was EveLynn’s women’s naked church that fell this past Sunday. It was essentially a church for women who identify as working or being called to work in some capacity as a sexuality professional or erotic educator. We gathered on Sunday and shared our stories, laughed and swam naked in the Sacred Haven heated pool and hot tub. At 3pm, we gathered in the pool and EveLynn ordained me into the Madonna  Ministry, something she and I had spoken about for years but only now on this day did it feel right to take that step. I emailed my father about my ordination and received an email from him which I have pasted below.

Dad,

Tomorrow I will be ordained into the Madonna Ministry by Bishop EveLynn Maurine. Molly and I have been staying in her Sacred Haven Sanctuary here in Orlando, FL with her and her two dogs and her beloved Roman. While my ordination will not change how I’m doing things in my work now, it will give me something to rest my spine against where my work can feel more contained and supported. http://www.madonnaministry.net/

Orlando is an interesting place. It’s warm here and I’m glad to have missed the snow storm in NY. I’m having a good time and Molly is a poolside chillin’ dog. Miss you!

Love,

Missa

Missa,

So happy for you. I think that your work is very powerful and if this helps support your vision then I am very pleased. I believe that

you are already are in tune with the Cosmic Consciousness and will be directed the ways you need to go. Just remember if something

doesn’t feel right it probably isn’t and if you feel a ‘warm glow’ flowing from your heart out then it is.

Miss you too. Please keep me up to date.

Love you.

Dad

ImageI think we found the warm glow feeling. Here is my ordination pic.

My father, despite the controversial nature and cutting edge of this work, particularly as it is viewed from the Bible belt, has been quietly supportive of my chosen path. It is more than I could have ever hoped for. My mother and I have had a different journey as I have stepped into my dharma and becoming.

I will continue to take sessions here at Sacred Haven with EveLynn through February 18th.  Then I fly back to New York for a few days and then sojourn again in New Orleans where I will celebrate my birthday and bask in the energy of Mardi Gras with dear friends.

I’m so incredibly grateful for the wonderful people I’ve met and the deeply nourishing journey since the beginning of the year.

In Deep Gratitude,

Isis

Aside